

They often view things in black and white terms, alternating between seeing a person as completely good or completely evil. For example, their emotions may appear disproportionate to the situation, and they may obsess over their relationships. People with borderline personality disorder may intensely fear abandonment and have trouble managing their emotions. It is important to reiterate that erotomania is very different to obsessive love. This is because it allows people with obsessive tendencies to observe others from a distance, and to feel closer to them than they might otherwise feel.

One 2017 case study argues that social media can make erotomania worse. Erotomania also involves symptoms of paranoia. Some delusions may be so extreme that they cause the person to engage in stalking, abuse, or violent behavior. For example, they may believe that they have a nonexistent relationship with a celebrity. Sometimes, the object of their love may even be someone that they do not know.

The person may even delude themselves into believing that a relationship that ended long ago is still loving and healthy.Įrotomania can also cause a person to believe that another person loves them.

This is not the same thing as obsessive love, but it may be a symptom of a much more serious mental health condition.Įrotomania is a rare delusional disorder that may cause a person to believe that destiny requires a specific relationship. Mental health conditions such as bipolar I disorder and schizophrenia, as well as symptoms triggered by alcohol use disorder, may cause delusions of erotomania. Erotomania and other delusional disorders The sections below discuss these factors in more detail. There are many factors that may cause obsessive love. Obsessive love sometimes involves a relationship that does not actually exist, such as with a celebrity or a stranger. Although breakups are usually painful and can trigger unhealthful behavior, people with feelings of obsessive love may refuse to accept that the relationship has ended. Obsessive love makes it very difficult for a person to let go. In some cases of obsessive love, there may be “splitting.” This occurs when the person sees the object of their love as perfect one moment and evil the next. Obsessive love may involve worship and a refusal to acknowledge any flaws. Real love involves accepting the other person and acknowledging their flaws. Real love prioritizes the other person’s well-being, while obsessive love may involve physical violence or emotional abuse. Real love requires compromise and negotiation, while obsessive love demands that the object of affection submits to the demands of their partner. The following are some other distinguishing features of obsessive love: This, in turn, may mean that they show little interest in the other’s well-being. Rather than loving the person and wanting the best for them, people with obsessive tendencies may love the other person because of their own needs. One hallmark of obsessive love is its focus on the partner as an object for “consumption” or ownership, as opposed to an equal. They may appear to worship their partner at times, but become angry or jealous at the slightest threat. People with feelings of love experience a rush of dopamine and other powerful brain chemicals.įor some people, these feelings are so powerful that they become obsessed with keeping and controlling the person they love. Likewise, there is no single list of criteria that can distinguish obsessive love from real love. Share on Pinterest A person experiencing obsessive love may view their loved one as a possession rather than an equal.įorming a definition of “real” love has eluded philosophers for centuries. Keep reading to learn more about what characterizes obsessive love, the causes and symptoms behind it, and some possible treatment options. In very extreme cases, this may even trigger acts of violence or abuse. If the person experiencing feelings of obsessive love does not receive treatment for the overall symptoms, they may struggle to emotionally regulate these feelings. However, obsessive love can be a sign of other mental health challenges and conditions.
#HOW TO STOP BEING OBSESSED WITH SOMEONE MANUAL#
Indeed, it is not currently listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Health professionals do not widely recognize obsessive love, or “obsessive love disorder,” as a mental health condition. Obsessive love takes these emotions further, causing a person to fixate on their loved one as though they are an object or possession. Many people have felt the pain of a broken heart and the intensity of infatuation. It can also trigger immense devastation when the other person does not return the sentiment.
